Are we in a gay sports bar?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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