The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
