as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
