plz talk dirty to me
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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