I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize