ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
So many bounce houses so little time
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
