no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Vodka?
Forever.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
