i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
