Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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