sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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