Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
As shirtless as possible
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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