Hey man sorry I got all grabby
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
