butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My nipple is on Facebook.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
