my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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