omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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