You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
