good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
