How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize