i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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