I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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