There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
