She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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