I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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