my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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