dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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