Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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