I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize