her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
