kristin has been a bad kristin
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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