Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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