Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
