Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
