the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
