Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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