evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
