You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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