Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Randomize