yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I checked into jail on foursquare
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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