I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
