I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
