We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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