have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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