you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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