Me. At least after what I've been through.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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