Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
