Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
