Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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