Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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