Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize