Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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