I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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