I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
